Running
by Soulreciever
Summary: Tom is haunted still by the memories of he the Fantom slew. Yet why does he feel that he is missing something important about the whole thing and indeed why does He still haunt him?
1. memories

Running.

1.Memories. 

T: Hi. This will be my first jaunt into the fandom of lxg, but I'm by no means a fan fic newbe so I'll understand any sensible criticisms you may wish to give. The idea for this first chapter came when I watched the movie the second time through and noticed that Tom seemed to be looking at things that were not there and awful lot and of course from Mina's little piece of wisdom.

Lxg is not mine, nor are any of the books that spawned the characters present within the movie. Warnings of angst, a Tom more like that Twain imagined and a pre warning of slash themes coming up in the next chapter.

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She had said that they were all running in some way and though he could see it in the others, he'd wondered what she supposed he was running from? After all he had already told them his story, had all but admitted his one guilt.

As for the pain of it, well that had been why he'd joined the League in the first place, to track down the Fantom and do to him as he'd done to…

Yet why, if he had accepted, was he seeing Him still everywhere he looked?

Mostly silent, but sometimes making quips as only He could, like back when he had offered Mina his help at the beginning of it all. Her response and then the smooth baritone of His dig ringing sharp in his ears, "Real sharp, Agent Sawyer. Real sharp!" had flushed him and made him feel difficult. And again with Quatermain, when He had uttered the exact phrase He had spoken that night, a phrase that had been one of His very last words.

"Looks like Agent Sawyer has another plan in the works." And suddenly he found himself saying something silly and Alan had left him with the memory of that night.

It had been raining; indeed the occasional spot still caught his skin, their presence keeping the air cold and his blood slow. 

_"Well we sure can pick em." The other remarks and he smiles for it has been a while since either of them has been weary enough to revert to the accents of their childhood._

_"We'll see if we can't do something about that, shall we?" He enquires and the other rolls his eyes,_

_"Oh dear! It looks like Agent Sawyer has another plan." The other responds and as He smiles he can see the adult his friend has become for the very first time. It scares him, for the other is supposed to be the less mature of them, the one to use humour when it is needed and if he has aged beyond that then what hope is there for him?_

_"Well, Tom, are you going to tell me what the plan is?" He enquires and Tom smiles, though his heart is not in it, for he is asking himself again the question of when this change occurred._

_He had left St. Louis just after his eighteenth Birthday to attend the sick bed of his dear Aunt Sally and everything had been all together then and as it should be. Yet when she had sweated away the sickness and he'd returned a month later, everything had been inside out._

_For his friend was not only in school but was dressed all civilised as he's sworn he'd never do after he came back from his adventures. Yet though the change had been unnerving Tom saw now that it had benefit, for through the change his friend had gained enough civility that he was asked into the agency as well as Tom himself._

_"We hit him now when he's alone." Tom responded, aware by his friend's face that he had taken longer than was acceptable to reminisce. Yet the other did not ask about what had brought about the silence, just as Tom had never directly asked what had brought about the change._

_"Well it's typical of you at least, Tom, but we can't just blunder on in this time. Especially as its against orders."_

_"Our orders are very loosely worded, you know that as well as I. Anyway, if we get him now there will be no war,"_

_"And we'll be famous? That's what's got you in such a hitch isn't it? The thought that you could work this to your favour." He says and Tom opens his mouth to counter as he always does, to fall into their old routine of tease and response. Yet the words fall idle today and the other shakes his head "Well even if your motives are off the reasoning is sound." And He grips his Winchester harder to Him and starts out into the street. Tom follows close behind and soon enough they duck again into shadow so that they might assure themselves that the building ahead is not guarded. _

_In the silence Tom finds that he has a yearning to say something, but he does not know what and as he tries to comprehend what the words might be the other makes a signal and they are off again._

_And as they cross into the dark building…_

_                                                                 A voice slurred by scars and burns (though this is all imitation as Tom will later learn)_

_                                                                A light and a press of unexpected men (Their intelligence little more than the lure of the Fantom)_

_                                                               A Threat containing a choice that is hard_

_(A choice that is made for them in the end) _

_                                                        And then…_

The splash of a whale cresting the sea had stirred him from the memory and he'd gone to distract himself, gone to think of something other than that instant. Yet now, locked away in the silent dark of his cabin there were no distractions and he sees it clearly.

Blood. It had coated his hands as he had taken the other up into his arms, carrying him until the agency had found him. Until they had taken them both the hospital…

He'd been dismissed quickly and he'd left with riotous indignation burning a whole in his belly. The next he recalled he was walking the distance to the agency head quarters and he wondered at the gap and he had the niggling feeling that something had occurred in that space of time, something very important indeed.

A knock on the door interrupted the train of thought and a moment later Mina entered, something clenched in her hands and an apology clear in her eyes.

 "You will forgive the interruption, Tom, but a wire has come in for you." She said as she passed him a small scrap of paper.

He read it once and then sighed, of course it had been inevitable, he'd left on vacation so that he might hunt the Fantom down against orders. Once they had learned that the Fantom was dead of course they would send for him so that he might be judged as they saw fit.

"Well?" Mina enquired, polite despite her curiosity.

"I have been summoned back to America."

"I believe the League could do with a short break and as you will have to use the Nautilus as transportation we should take the opportunity presented to us." She said. He smiled, thank full that he had such good friends.

Time to face my daemons he thought to himself, glancing almost without thought to where the other stood, silent this time and perhaps that was a mercy.

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T: A little thought before I leave you to review (Hint, hint). I always thought that it was a bit of a leap that a supposedly intelligent organisation let Huck Finn have a gun legally. Not that I don't love Huck it's just…well…if you understand I don't need to explain and if you don't it's most likely you never will. Therefore as I have decided that yes it was Huck that Tom was referring to (As this is never implicit, just assumed) I have educated the beloved rouge up a little so that giving him a weapon is less a thing of chance.

Anyway as I have said there is a slash theme to the next chapter and some very complex Sawyer reasoning. Yes this does deserve a warning of its own.

RR, and I may let Tom live…Mwhahaha.


	2. home

Running.

2.coming home.

T: Second and last part of this fic. The movie is not mine, the books complied together to create the movie and the original comics are not mine. Slash and a plethora of darker more complicated Sawyer thoughts. I would just like to ensure both       that I have let Tom go and inform     that I cannot divulge whom the slash will involve as that would be telling!

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He could not help but wonder where the catch was. True enough he would have to of returned home anyway for the funeral, that was assuming of course they had not already held it.

No. No that was just his foolish heart talking, it had only been a week after all and the weather had just been turning chilly as he had left, enough so that they would have felt happier keeping…the body…in state for a while. And of course they would have mentioned it in the communication had they buried Him while he'd been off, or at least they would of if they had any decency in their heart.

Shaking free the grim thoughts he tried to focus on the positive. He'd be seeing all his old friends again and perhaps this time it would not be as odd as it had been before. He recalled still the two of them at the dock, Joe treating him as spun glass and asking always if perhaps Tom would be better taking a vacation in America rather than abroad, the question because he had know, because he had seen the light in Tom's eyes. And Becky, beautiful, quiet Becky had looked at him as he started up the gangplank of the liner and taking a hold of his wrist had enquired,

_"Oh, Tom, you do not realise do you?"_ and he'd wanted to admit his ignorance, to ask what she ment. But the anger had still been fresh in his mind, wiping away more rational thought, so that it was not until much later that he regretted not asking.

He could see the shoreline encroaching upon the horizon and he felt his nerves catch.

                                  It would not be all that long at all now.

"Tom?" And that was Mina again, her voice a little softer in the open air.

"Mina." He acknowledged and she came to his side, her steps slower as if she were expecting him to bolt at any moment.

"How does it feel?"

"To be going home?" He asked and he smiled, his heart truly not in the expression. "Odd. It won't be the same without…" He trailed, not wishing to mention it, as if by doing as such he could change reality and make everything how it should be.

"Your friend?" Mina enquired.

"He was what made St. Louis home."

"It is hard to lose one that you have cared for. Yet this is life and we must move on as best we can." She said and Tom knew she was talking of her husband, for who else would bring such a shadow to her eyes?

"Do you still think of him?"

"Sometimes."

"And have you seen him at all?" He enquired, broaching the subject as subtly as possible and yet Mina still fixed him in her eyes a moment before she replied,

"No. He haunted my dreams for a long while, yet never have I seen him in the daylight." Of course he has expected nothing less, yet why did he see Him everywhere when Mina had never seen her husband? Why did his memory not wish to fade and indeed why did he keep thinking that there was something significant in that small scrap of missing time?

Yet what was there to recall?

                                              _Blood. It is everywhere upon his skin and he just wishes to wash it away, wishes to remove all traces of the incident from his mind.  Yet they will not let him go and he must sit here coated in His blood._

He feels suddenly ill and thrusts his mind from the recollection, thrusts it forwards.

_He has changed, yet he can still smell the blood upon his skin and he wonders for the look in his superior's eyes if he can smell it also.  For that is fear behind the rims of his specials, fear and the weary assessment that is always there, a mark of a true leader or so his superior would say. _

"You have to let me go, sir." He said and his superior sighed and pressed further into his chair,

_"Sawyer, I understand why you are doing this. Hell! If I were in your place… but that is why I have to say no. We need an impartial agent on this, someone who can see this with a clear head and spare the Fantom should that prove the better option."_

_"Spare him? The man is trying to insight war in Europe. Heck he's most probably after a world war and your willing to give him mercy?" _

_"You see, Sawyer, this is precisely why_ _you can not continue this any further. In fact it might be an idea if you take leave for a while, get your head back together. I hear that London is a pleasant spot for a vacation." His superior had said. Tom had not missed the hint and with a nod he had left to organise his vacation. _

He wondered, with a small smile, if he would be allowed to have a real vacation one this one was over. Some time to gather his thoughts and decide where his loyalties lay.

Did he remain with the League and take up the mantel left to him by Alan? Or did he go back to the agency and plead with them for the chance to stay on as a solo operation? For the thought of getting another partner, of replacing Him…it was wrong.

Entirely so.

"Digging yourself holes again, hey, Agent Sawyer?" He enquires and Tom shakes his head before mumbling,

"I believe I might just well be." Low enough so Mina cannot hear, so that she does not think him mad.

The docks at St. Louis were exactly as they had been when he left, right down to the two stood at the bottom of the docking ramp. Joe was as always dressed to immaculate precision, even the holsters of his pistols managing to follow the lines of style present in his clothes. He looked tired, yet he smiled as his eyes caught Tom, a genuine smile with something lingering behind it.

Becky too had fatigue in her eyes and the disarray of her clothes and hair warned she had had little time to dress. She did not smile at Tom, but merely moved a hand to play with her curls; a nervous habit picked up in adolescence and not lost since.

"Well this is a disappointment. I had expected to at least see the Chief here, as it was at his word that I have come back."

"The chief has things to deal with." Joe said, the burr in his voice a familiarity that Tom had almost forgotten. "He sent me to explain things."

"Explain things?" Tom enquired and it was Becky, not Joe, who replied,

"Yes, there is something you have to know Tom." And the catch in her voice was excitement, yet for what? What was there to know that would cause such reaction? Again the press of that forgotten moment, shaken away quickly as he recalled that there were introductions to make.

"Where are my manners?" He enquired, turning a little so that he could see both the League members and his old friends. "This is Mr. Joe Harper and Miss Rebecca Thatcher. Joe, Becky, may I introduce Miss Whilamina Harker, Captain Nemo and Dr. Henry Jeckle." He said. Each member of the League offered their own unique greeting and Tom breathed a little sigh of relief, well they seemed to be able to get on well enough. Yet he could not help but wonder how they would take to Skinner or Edward, if either showed themselves. Skinner would be easy enough to deal with, a little skin hued face paint and some proper clothing and then they would never know…Edward would be harder, but Henry had more of a grip on him these days, enough so that the threat of an appearance was relatively slim.

"It is a pleasure," Becky replied before she moved forwards and caught a hold of Tom's wrist again. "Tom. I really have to tell you something, alone." He shook her hand off, and then his eyes caught Mina's head moving to focus on something just out of his eyesight. Turning so that he might see what was so fascinating his eyes caught…

Blue eyes hidden beneath an unruly mass of brown curls, faint freckles dusting slightly tan skin and a ragged appearance despite the neatness of his clothes.  Tom has seen this face so many times before, yet he knows this is real, for there is a fatigue in those eyes and a raise at one shoulder to indicate the padding of bandages beneath his clothes.

Tom feels the world tilt slightly and his heart flutters into a wild staccato in his ears. Becky catches him as he slumps forwards, the worry in her eyes faded away into a fain joy.

"He's alive Tom. He's alive." She says and suddenly the small space of time fills up with memory.

An orderly is keeping pace behind him and having no more wish to be dogged he rounds on him.

_"Yes?" He enquires and the young man takes a few steps back before he says,_

_"Mr. Sawyer, I do not think it is wise that you leave at the moment, especially when the man you came in with…"_

"Yes, yes. I am very much aware of his situation."

_"No, no you do not understand…"_

_"Look I do not have time for this." _ _He had said before he had turned again, deaf now to all the other has to say._

Feeling a little foolish Tom takes the hand that Becky offers him and once he is on his feet he closes the distance between himself and the other.

"Huck." He says, the name feeling odd on his tongue for he has not spoken it since that day. His friend smiles then, a warm lopsided grin that was infectious.

"Thought something like that could keep me down, did you?" He enquires and that was enough for Tom. His hands shaking he catches his friend up into a hug, never wanting to let go ever again. He felt the rise of the words beneath his chest, closer than they had been on that day, yet still to far to voice or comprehend.

"I thought you were dead." He says eventually and Huck sighs, the sound welcome for it is a living one.

"I almost was. They tell me that if the bullet had been a little further left…lucky for me he was wearing that stupid mask I suppose."

"Can you not be so flippant about it?" Tom chides and Huck broke into laughter, the sound so high and bright that though Tom had been serious in the warning he felt himself too fall to laughing.

He let Huck go a moment after that and turning again to the League he placed a hand to his friends shoulder and says,

"I never believed I would have the chance to do this. This is my oldest and dearest friend Huckleberry Finn. Huck this is…"

"Let me see…Nemo, Jeckle, Mrs. Harker." Huck said, bowing to each in turn.

"It seems you have been well informed Mr. Finn." Mina remarked and Huck tapped the badge pinned to his left lapel. 

"I am Tom's partner, Mrs Harker and though he believed me permanently out of action shall we say? The leader of our little rabble has kept me well informed of the situation."

"Then you would not find yourself at odds if you had occasion to join the League?" Mina enquired and Huck nodded,

"Yes, that was half the reason for the updates. I knew that, if Tom decided to remain with you one he knew that things were not as he believed, I would join you also." He said and Tom felt his heart lift at that, for though he had assumed that Huck would go where he lead it was nice to have the confirmation unasked for from his friend.

"Well I would say that is enough gathering wool for today." Joe said after a moment of silence. "If you folks will follow Becky she'll get you housed for the night. Tom, the chief will want his report." And Tom felt a little of his elation fade,

"Best get it out of the way," Huck said and the dejection in his voice was a comfort, though not much of a one all things considered.

The meeting had gone rather oddly, for not only had Tom been officially congratulated for taking down the Fantom on what had been a holiday when he left. But he had also been informed that the agency believed it would be best on all sides if he remained with the League as a mediator between the two forces.

That ment that not only could he again wear his badge, but that he could take up the position Alan had given to him with his dying breaths.

A smile caught his lips and he lifted his head to gaze at the stars, content to be again within the quite still of his hometown.

"Must be a blessing to be able to get your feet up." And Tom started for he had not heard his friend approach.

"Heck, I'm beginning to think you are a ghost." He said and Huck smiled before settling into the empty chair at Tom's left.

"Nah, I'm just lighter on my feet that last I saw you. But of course I'm not the only one who's changed since then."

"Time changes us all in the end." Tom responded the words evasive for he had no wish to answer the question embedded within Huck's sentence. If only because he wasn't sure why he'd changed. Of course Alan's death had a large part in it, for it had brought upon him responsibility the like of which he'd never had before.

The other part of it all was Huck's death and that was what he couldn't explain, the emotions connected to that event. The emotions sparked again within him somewhere by Huck's return to his life.

Huck shook his head a little and turning his eyes to the sky said,

"You know I would tell you if only you asked, Tom." And though it had little bearing on what had gone before Tom knew what his friend was referring to.

"Why ask now? When it was all so long ago?"

"Yet you wonder even now. I see it in your eyes sometime and it makes me itch, for our friendship has never been about distance or keeping things silent." Huck said and Tom felt a yearning to ask what their friendship was about. For back in their childhood it had been an admiration and the yearning on Tom's part to dabble a little in Huck's freedom. After that?

It had been so awkward for a while, for he'd not understood how to treat Huck now that he was civilised and for a few frightening months they'd almost gone their separate ways. Yet familiarity and the happy memories of childhood had seen them true and little by little Tom had comprehended that it was only the outside of Huck that had changed.

They'd never really talked about that difficulty, indeed Tom had tried to forget for fear that it would surface again and he'd loose Huck forever. Yet why was that such a fearful concept? Sure it was lonely without his friend, as the last few weeks had proven, but why? What bonded them together when they were so different? When the magic had long since faded?

"Trust." Huck responded and Tom started at that for he knew that he had not posed the question out loud.

"How did you…?"

"Know?  Tom, you are my closest friend, so much so that I think you almost a part of me. You have been thinking on the foundations of our friendship for a great while, for I changed and thus changed your perspective on things,

"I must apologise for that, but while you were away visiting your dear aunt I had time to think. I could see your future stretching far ahead of you as bright as a star, while my own was sinking down into the dirt with my father. That I feared more than anything, becoming as he was and dying alone and unloved as he had been.

"Thus I decided to make a go of things, if not for myself then for my friends, for I did not wish you worrying for me or my life when time moved on. It's worked out better than I had hoped, for I cleaned my act enough that the agency asked for me as well as you to join."

"You know that you would never have descended to his level, don't you Huck? For your heart has always been in the right place…"

"Even if my head was not?" Huck enquired, the comment enough to break the tension at last.

"You really do not suit well to serious conversations do you?"

"I do when I have to, otherwise why be dour when there is no need? You over think things Tom, always have and always will."  Huck responded. And Tom cannot counter that for he knew it was true.

Perhaps he would be better letting things go and once in a while doing as his heart said was right. "Did Becky talk to you before you left?" Huck enquired and Tom recalled again her hesitant question once more, _"You do not realise do you?"_  Realise what, he wondered again and then despite himself he enquired,

"How did you know?" And Huck blanched at that, his head inclining a little more to the sky.

"What did she say?" And though Tom was a little infuriated for a question to answer his question he replied,

"Very little, indeed I would so as far as to say that she was infuriatingly oblique." He heard Huck let out a breath and he felt his anger rise a little more. Had his friend not just been saying about how their friendship was not built on secrets?

He felt also a little odd, as if a firm bubble of some veracious energy had caught in his heart, an energy that made him want to shout and laugh all at the same time.

This emotion and the words still a great distance out of his reach were connected he realised suddenly. Yet how? And what was Huck's interest in what Becky had been trying to tell him?

He wondered if Huck would tell him the answer to this riddle or was he going to be left stranded without a light to see his compass in the dark.  He shook his head clear, extended metaphors were never a good thing, always heralding a migraine or advanced confusion when they appeared. But that was because he was thinking too hard again, not just about his mental processes, but also about the whole thing. Breathing deeply he turned to look at Huck, not thinking but feeling in hopes of finding some pathway in the dark.

Contentment, as always when in his friends company, contentment at being safe and protected within the folds of a strong friendship. Lingering traces of relief scattered low in his chest, relief at Huck's vitality and for the chance of an off target bullet. The broil of his joy mixed in with a spark of nervous energy to create that incomprehensible emotion that scattered his wits.

This feeling, he realised, was what he wants to explain. Yet what was it? Thinking too much would confuse the issue, yet not thinking at all would be paramount to ignoring the feeling all together.

He sighed and that caught Huck's attention, for a moment later he was looking into those blue eyes.

They were darker in the night, more of a sapphire blue than their usual paler sky hue. Yet even clouded by the poor light Huck's feelings were clear within them, a warm mix of friendly good nature and the spice of his mischievousness. A spark of something else also, a heat Tom did not know but caught at the odd energy within himself and made him want to stretch out and touch his friend, if only for a fleeting moment.

Again Becky's question in his mind and he knew suddenly the answer to all of his questions and to that one in particular. It was inexplicitly simple now that he knew, but this sort of thing always was, for looking at something at the other end removed the doubts and second guesses to be removed so that only one clear answer remained.

He stood and moving the scant inches came to Huck's side, kneeling down before he reached a hand to his friends face. Huck regarded him with a quiet intrigue, only his eyes betraying his hope and the light of that other emotion.

Spurred on by that light and the own hard flicker of his heart he lent forwards and caught him up into a kiss.

When he pulled away at last Huck prevented the distance widening past the brush of foreheads by catching Tom's face.

"How long?" Tom managed after a moment, the question as much for himself as Huck.

"Feels like forever if I'm true with myself. But I realised a few weeks before we got the Fantom assignment.

"Realised but kept mum because I didn't know what you felt and because I was scared…" He trailed and Tom knew the rest, for he had been scared also. Scared of loosing Huck forever and scared of having all his thoughts, hopes and secret heart turned against him in anger and hate. 

Had Becky come to Huck or the other way around he wondered? She comprehending though objectiveness both their fears and the care they shared and Huck hesitant to admit to such a weakness in front of anyone.

Becky's question had been in regards to both their feelings, did Tom not realise that he loved Huck that Huck loved him in return? That if Tom but thought a moment clearly there would be no need to increase the heartache, for Huck was alive. Did he not realise that either?

And that had been what Huck had feared, that Becky had exposed something that was his to tell if and when he wished too.

Not that any of it mattered though, for it had all turned out in the end, if only because he'd allowed himself to feel rather than think.

"There was no need." He replied before he brought him again into a kiss.

In a window just above and to the left of the pair Mina watched, satisfied that at last Tom had stopped running from who he was, from his heart. Perhaps it was time she too did the same…

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T: Thank you again to for my lovely reviews and see no harming of Tom, indeed very happy Tom. Little nod here that perhaps Mina is not talking about her hubby, this is your choice, personally having been very influenced by the movie I think she's thinking of Dracula.

RR because I'd be sad if you didn't…L


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